10 Tips For Air Travel.

 

    Being a professional driver, I get a lot of questions about what it's like to be on the roads so much.  The delicate truth is, I actually log more air miles every year than road miles. 

  I get to spend way more time at airports than I would like to, because I'm typically flying back and forth to the vehicles I'm moving around the country.  Over the years, it's given me the opportunity to observe a few things.  And I've learned a few things that have made my traveling life easier, and might help make yours easier too.    So without further ado, I give you 10 tips to make your air travel easier:

1: You are NOT a Sherpa. 

This has to be the most egregious violation that I see.  There are disturbing number of people that try to carry every single thing they own onto the plane with them.  If you do this, you are holding up the TSA security checkpoint, you're holding up the loading process, You're delaying the unloading process.  In short, you are making everybody else in the world late.  If $25 to check a bag is going to break your back, then maybe air travel isn't for you.  One means one.  One carry on, and stop trying to carry on those damn steamer trunks. I promise, you are not going to need access to your entire makeup collection, your entire collection of hair bands, curling iron, hair dryer, exfoliating kit, on this flight.  Check that shit. Plus, drag-assing your entire wardrobe across a mile and a half in an airport to make a connecting is just exhausting. If you're carrying more than one bag while you're getting on the plane, you're wrong. End of story.  I can promise you that if you follow this one rule, you're traveling life will get a whole lot easier. 

2: Check your bags for free!

Okay, I get it.  You don't want to give the airlines one more red cent, and $25 to check a bag is highway robbery... Well, there's an easy way around that baggage fee.  Be "that guy" and  drag your entire luggage collection through the TSA security checkpoint.  However, once you get to your first gate, tell the attendant that you want to check your bags there.  They can do the whole process right at the gate, and they don't charge you for it there. They just tag your bag and put it on the plane, And you can collect it at the luggage carousel when you get to your destination.  Now keep in mind, this process only works if you're not caring something That's prohibited by TSA like volumes of liquids, or weapons. But if you're dragging your steamer trunk with you to avoid the $25 fee, this is an easy way to get around it, and still get to check your luggage.

3: Dress the part

I understand that air travel isn't  as luxurious as it used to be 50 years ago.  But you may want to think this one through before you head to the airport.  Pick comfortable clothes. Pick layered clothes.  Pick shoes that are comfortable to walk in, and run in.. because you might just be sprinting across the airport to make that connecting flight.  I've seen one too many women try this shit wearing high heels and it never works right.  Especially when she's dragging her four carry-on items and a steamer trunk with her.  Bring your noise canceling headset, because there will be screaming babies. You don't HAVE to dress nice.  However, one truth that I can speak to is that the more professional you look, the more professional you will be treated by the airline staff.   You're more than entitled to dress as comfortable as you want. But don't be surprised when people treat you as a reflection of your own outward appearance.

4: Have a plan.   Have a backup plan.

Before you ever leave to head to the airport, Make sure that you have a plan on what you're going to do.  If you're driving there, make sure you know where you need to park.  If you're catching a ride, make double sure on your agreed upon times.  Have a plan in place for what happens if your flight gets canceled, or you're connecting is late, or you're connecting gets canceled. It's okay to have already picked out an emergency hotel, or a place to rent a car.  If you've already anticipated the worst, It makes it easier to deal with if it happens.  I've watched people completely melt down in the airport, because their connecting was missed or canceled, and they just had absolutely no idea what to do.  

5: Know your airline hub.

I'm going to tell you a secret here, The cheapest flight isn't always the best flight.  Before you pick an airline, or a flight, make sure you know where their main hubs are at.  Let me give you an example.  I live in Florida. Because Delta's main hub is in Atlanta, I try to do as much business through Delta as I can.  The reason for this, is that the proximity to their hub means that fewer flights are canceled or delayed, and if they are, they're picked up pretty quickly.  American Airlines closest hub to me is in Charlotte North Carolina.  When I fly American, I get about 70% more cancellations or delays flying into Florida. With United's airline hubs being in Chicago and Houston, I don't even consider them.   When you're flying, the closer you are to an individual airlines hub, the lower the probability that you're going to get stranded. Keep that in mind when you book your flight.

6: Check your bags before you go.

Before you pack your bags to get on that plane, pick up every bag that you're going to use, and dump it all the way out.  Make sure that you put hands on every single thing that goes in that bag.  Take a mental inventory.  Take all your liquids, or liquid substances and put them in gallon Ziploc bags together.  That way if something leaks, it doesn't get all over your clothes. Checking your bags this way not only insures that you have everything you need, it insures that you don't have something you don't need, like an errant pocket knife or something stupid that you left in a bag that's going to get you in trouble with TSA when you're trying to get through security.  Hundreds of people are arrested every year for taking a gun through TSA that they "forgot was in their bag". Don't be "that guy".  Check your bags before you leave. 

7: Cranky? Maybe you're thirsty.

The process of pressurizing and depressurizing a plane cabin dehydrates you.  It's part of the reason why despite everything else, airlines still serve beverages on planes.  If you're feeling a little nauseous, or your head hurts, or you just a little cranky, drink some water.  You'll start to feel better in about 5 or 10 minutes I promise.  In fact, if that baby 2 seats behind you been screaming non stop for 45 minutes, you may want to politely point out this fact.  Baby may just be dehydrated.  But POLITELY.. mom's probably cranky too.

8: What's the hurry to board?

I see this every time I go to get on a flight.  They make an announcement over the intercom that they're going to board your flight in 10 minutes, And everybody stands up and gets in line.  I got news for you, you aren't going to get on the plane any faster, and you're not going to get to your destination any quicker if you stand in that line.  Do you know what you will get? After 25 minutes outstanding there, you'll get to sit in your seat, only to have every Sherpa with a steamer trunk struggle past you and smack you in the head with their bag as they're headed to the back of the plane.  If you're flying on an airline that has assigned seating, I promise you your seat is still going to be there.  Give it a little time, let the line die down a little bit, being last to get on the plane is actually kind of nice.  Sometimes there's an exit row seat available that isn't filled, and the steward just will let you take it.  

9: What's the hurry to disembark?

Guess what, if you stand up as soon as the plane lands and grab your steamer trunk and stand there in the center aisle for 10 minutes, You aren't going to get off the plane any faster, and you are going to get out of the airport any faster, you're just an asshole. The plane will actually unload faster if you sit in your seat and wait for your turn to get up and get out.  That way the people in front of you have room to maneuver to grab their own steamer trunks out of the overhead bins and get off the plane.  Yeah, I understand, sometimes late flights mean you're in a hurry to make a connecting.  If that's the case, just mention it to the airline stewardess before you land.  A lot of times they will help you make concessions to get off quickly to make your connecting if you need to.  Otherwise just sit there and wait your turn.

10 Be nice!

Airline staff have a terrible job.  They have to deal with a lot of their own rules, Most of them don't really know what's going on, and the few that do, have been instructed to lie to you.   Being nice, being friendly, will go a long long way with these people. Airline staff does have the ability, and the gumption to upgrade your seat if they want to to, give you free food or drinks if they want to, but it's entirely on them.  And more often than not, that's based entirely on how you treat them. Pro tip: Airline staff can, and will accept tips. I don't know about you, but I've found that when I tip somebody, they generally have a tendency to treat me better.

Bonus tip:

If you're going to be traveling more than twice a year by air, getting the TSA pre-trip screening done saves a TON of hassle and time.  It only costs about $85, and it's good for 5 years.  It's probably the smartest thing I've ever done when it comes to air travel.

By no means are these 'rules", nor be they set in stone.  I have just found that my life has gotten exponentially easier when I'm traveling, if I'm following a few guidelines.  You're welcome to give it a shot, or just keep dragging that steamer trunk through security... Your choice. 

Some of my favorite places to eat. Part 1 (Eastern US)

      One of the benefits of traveling is that I get to eat a lot of different foods from around the country. In fact, I make it a point to strive to find the most interesting culinary delights and save them to my list of "must eat places"  It dawned on me recently, that it does me no good at all to have such a list since I have already sampled all of these foods.   Unless, that is, I can share that list with someone else.  So, Here it is.  This is by no means a comprehensive list of anything other than some of my very favorite places to eat. It does not mean that there aren't better places, but I am reserving this list to places where I have actually eaten and can speak for the menu.  Some of them are elegant, some are holes in the wall, but they all have one thing in common; they knocked it out of the park when they served me food.  So, I present, in no particular order, some of my favorite places to eat in the United States:

Maple Street Biscuit Company

39 Cordova St, St. Augustine, FL 32084

    In a competitive market like St. Augustine Florida, its very tough to survive in the restaurant business if you are serving sub par food.  As the name would suggest, the Maple Street Biscuit Company specializes in Biscuits and Gravy and breakfast/brunch items.  In the heart of old town, the quaintness of the eatery betrays the hustle of the tourists rushing around outside.  Affordable great food served in a very laid back environment make this a "must do" if you are in St Augustine.  Just come early and hungry, because there is always a line.  

What to order:  Biscuits and Gravy, Waffles.  

Hip Hop Fish And Chicken

6610 N Main St, Jacksonville, FL 32208

     The "quaintness" of this eatery, tucked back into the hood of Jacksonville Florida, might fool you into thinking twice about eating here.  It did for me.  I'm glad I stayed.  I can't tell you what it is about the seasoning they use for their chicken and fish, but I would not be surprised if they were sprinkling some crack in it just to keep you addicted.   The secret seasoning they use on both their chicken and fish keep a perpetual line around the establishment during eating hours.  So if you don't want to wait, come early.

What to order: Chicken or fish.

Papa Bucks BBQ

1085 S Lewis St, Metter, GA 30439   

    Sitting in the remnants of a strip mall with a dirt parking lot, upon approaching Papa Bucks, you will probably be thinking I have lost my damn mind--up until you walk in the front door and see the wall plastered with thank you letters from the Food Network.  A late 50's motif decorates this small eatery and provides a very cozy atmosphere.  The meat in here is simply unmatched. From the brisket to the pulled pork. All slathered in that Georgia style sauce, Home made of course.   The creativity with which they serve it will keep you coming back for more.  I can sum up this place with a simple story:  I sent my friend Nicholas here.  He called me that night and said:  "I ordered an entree. I ate the entire thing.  Then, I ordered another entire entree.... and ate that too".

What to order:  Scooby Snacks, Pigzilla

Macs Speed Shop

2414 Sandy Porter Rd, Charlotte, NC 28273

     Another BBQ joint, this time in the Carolinas.  Mac's has, because of their fantastic food and clean, laid back environment,  found amazing success in Charlotte. Leading to the opening of several satellite locations.  The Meat is always cooked to perfection.  The home made sauce is of course the "Carolina" variety and deserves it's own article.  Service is top notch, and Mac's is a Charlotte "Must do"

What to order: Burnt ends, brisket.

Genos Steaks

1219 S 9th St, Philadelphia, PA 19147

    Before everyone gets into a tift about Philly Cheesesteaks, I KNOW that every place in Philly has the best cheesesteaks.  I won't debate that.  I will just say, that my experience was hands down, With Geno's, AMAZING.  The Cheesesteak I ordered was longer than my arm.  I am not exaggerating when I say, It took me 2 days to finish it.  It was pure bliss of sliced steak and melty cheese.  You may find something better, but for my money, I'll stick with Genos

What to order:  Duh

Jake n Joes Sports Grille

25 Foxborough Blvd, Foxborough, MA 02035

    About a half hour south of Boston, this otherwise non imposing eatery seems pretty run of the mill.  All the way up to the point where you order the clam chowder.   Now, my experience may be a bit skewed here because it has always been damn cold every time I go to Boston.  But nothing has ever warmed me all the way to my soul like the clam chowder served at Jake n Joes.  I spent a solid week camped up the street, and it was all I ate the entire time I was there.  Like I said, maybe it was the cold weather, but I've eaten a lot of clam chowder, and I have never had it's equal.

What to order: Clam Chowdah'

 

Reds & Trudys

501 Portville-Ceres Rd, Portville, NY 14770

  I have said it many times: When it comes to serving food, do one thing and do it better than anyone else in the world.  Reds & Trudys has the market cornered on loose meat sandwiches, end of story.  I am not from anywhere NEAR Portville, but Introduced to me by Melissa over a decade ago, I immediately fell in love with the simple, flavorful, humble loose meat sandwich that is the back bone of this establishment. 

What to order:  Loose meat sandwich---probably should get 4 or 5 of them.

Charlie the Butcher's Carvery

770 Elmwood Ave ste a, Buffalo, NY 14222

   Upstate New York is famous for a sandwich that you may have never heard of, it's the "Beef on Weck".  Sliced roast beef served on a buttery and salty topped kummelweck bun.  My description will never do it justice.  There is much debate in the Buffalo area about who "was the first" to make it.  The fans of Charlie the Butcher sent me there to settle the debate, and I quickly forgot who the other competitor was, and didn't care.  It's an upstate culinary delight that deserves a stop.

What to order:  Beef on Weck

Dixie Chili

733 Monmouth St, Newport, KY 41071

      Cincinnati style chili is entirely unique unto itself.  Nothing else in the food world really compares to it.  Dixie Chili, based right across the Ohio river in Newport Kentucky is debatably one of the oldest Cincinnati style chili restaurants in the area.  There are a couple locations, but the small size, in my mind, keeps the quality higher.  They do sell their chili in cans too if you want to take some home with ya.

What to order:  Chili dogs, with cheese.

Melt Bar & Grilled

3921 Medina Rd, Akron, OH 44333

     Of all the places on this list, Melt may deserve it's own entire blog.  Maybe I am biased, but the 80's motif, along with the top notch food, in my mind, could not be beat.  I have, since Hurricane Charly took down the only restaurant in town that served a Monte Cristo, have been, on the search for the "perfect Monte Cristo sandwich".  I found it at Melt Bar and Grilled in Ohio.   This place is already spinning off franchises as fast as they can be built.  I am pretty sure that every single thing on the menu was offered batter dipped, and deep fried.    While their claim to fame is grilled cheese, I never slowed down to try it.  I stuffed myself with as much rich, fatty, fried goodness as I could absorb, and rolled my ass out the door---only to return the next day and do it again. 

What to order:  MONTE CRISTO!

I realized, after starting this list, that I have several dozen really good places that I just love to frequent across the country.  So, I have decided to split this up into several blogs to keep it from getting too lengthy.  So, if you didn't see your area in here or your favorite eatery, (not that I care what YOUR favorite place is), Just check back in a day or two, I may have gotten up the gumption to write the sequel.

10 Tips for using hotels when you travel

  I travel a lot.  My job is traveling.  I've had boots on the ground in all lower 48 states this decade.  Because I travel, I spend, on average 100 nights a year in hotel rooms.   I've stayed in all manner of hotels and motels.  These are a few of the tricks I have picked up along the way that might make your next travel experience a little easier.  

1:  Everyone likes money.  I have yet to encounter a person in the hospitality industry who does not like to get a monetary tip.  True, money can't buy everything, but it can surely buy you an upgrade.  A ten dollar bill for the front desk clerk might mean the difference between spending the night in a $120 double queen, or a  $190 king suite at the double queen price.    Which brings us to:

2:  The staff does have the ability to adjust your rates.  They have the ability to dispense free upgrades. They have the freedom to hand out a lot of free perks to guests.  And most of the time, their attitude about this is entirely based on your attitude towards them.  (see rule number 1). You will get more flies with honey than with shit.  These people work hard.  Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and don't be an entitled ass.  Sometimes mistakes are made, be willing to forgive stupid shit and they will usually be more inclined to make sure you have a pleasant stay.

3: Forgot your razor?  That's okay.  MOST hotels have a stash of toiletries behind the counter in case you forgot something.  Even the ones with vending machines that sell razors for 5 bucks a piece will usually give you a free one if you just ask for it. You would be surprised what they might just hand out for free.  Ask before you run off and buy something.  But you also forgot your phone charger?   A telling amount of people leave behind device chargers which they throw in a "lost and found" box.  After 6 months, they usually empty the box and start over.   Ask at the desk if they have a spare charger before you run and buy a new one.  I've also done this with reading glasses. 

 "I stayed here last week and left my glasses behind"   

"We have this box of glasses..."   

**starts trying on glasses** 

"Nope, nope, nope,--AH these are it"  (puts on pink reading glasses).  The girl behind the counter giggled and sent me on my way.

4:  Do your research.  Read the user reviews.  I've stayed at plenty of 2 star hotels that outclassed 4 star hotels.  The user reviews, especially on Google can be very telling about a hospitality establishment.  I stayed at a motel in Galveston a couple of years ago that had an overall rating of 1.7 stars.  But I read the reviews and saw that all the recent ones raved about the new remodel and new management.  All with 5 stars and stellar reviews.  The low overall score kept the beachfront room to $78 a night.  It was an amazing experience at a bargain price.  

5: Don't ask for a room by the elevator.   Drunk, loud, obnoxious people use the elevator at 2:30 in the morning.  Ask for a room on the ground floor or by the stairs.  Speaking of drunk people:

6: Nicer hotels might not rent to you if you have a local address.  They aren't stupid.  They know you came there to get drunk, get loud, make a mess, and generally be an ass.  They don't want it.  They might just tell you they are sold out for the night---sorry.  On this vein, try to clean up after yourself. It's okay to leave a little mess behind, but if you do, leave a tip for housekeeping.  They are some of the hardest working people in the country.  If you are gonna make them work harder, at least pay them for it.--See rule number 1.

7:  Check in/ Check out times are not set in stone.  Sometimes you can check in early or check out late without a penalty if you just ask nicely--See rule number 1

8: Don't get the upgraded internet.  It's just the same shitty internet speed, but now you paid 6 bucks to access it.  Free breakfast is free for a reason.  It's usually not very good.  Don't have high expectations with free shit, just be grateful when it's pretty good. 

9:  Don't rent rooms near truck stops, colleges or hospitals.  Rooms near truck stops and colleges are generally poorly maintained.  Their clientele typically does not have much respect for the establishment and it gets run down pretty fast.  As far as hospitals go, I have found that these establishments usually house the relatives of folk who are under medical care.  One too many times, I have gotten on the elevator and had this conversation:  Me: "Mornin!  Wonderful day.  What brings you to town"?   Guy in elevator: "Oh my 12 year old daughter has cancer".  Me:  "I'll just shut up now".  Also, if you just LOVE the sound of ambulances running by your room at all hours of the day and night, be my guest.  Otherwise, if you want quiet, stay away. 

10: Get the app.  The hotel apps usually offer better rates.  They also have offers like double points for an extra 5 or 10 bucks.  Those points add up quick and lead to free stays.  

     Using your head and making adult judgement calls will usually keep you in a pretty good place.  A lot of things are pretty much common sense, like if the pool hours are 4 to 10, don't be in the pool drunk at 10:45 making a mess.  I hope these few tips will help you have a happier, better stay at your next hospitality resort.   ...just remember rule number 1 and you will be fine.  

 

     

General Tojo

 

     It was early spring in 1983.  Random patches of dirty ice and snow still littered the ground. The weather was a bit prickly but threatening to submit to the incoming sunshine.  A 13 year old Howie Grace stood there, on the Northwest corner of 11th and Main in Keokuk Iowa. Jaw agape, unblinking, immobile.  Staring, just staring at what had to be the most perfect piece of muscle that Detroit had ever produced.  It was Henry Ford's favorite shade of black.  429 Cubic inches of horses stuffed under the massive hood of a 1969 Thunderbird. A leather interior with all the fixins that were available to the space age driver were protected on either side by Suicide doors... IT HAD SUICIDE DOORS!  Retractable headlights rounded out the incredibly stylish front end... I was awestruck.  This moment, this vehicle sitting on that used car lot that I cut through every day on my walk to school, which had materialized, overnight, with the mind bending price of $500.00... That vehicle started my boyhood love affair with the American Automobile.  The look on my face that morning, late for School, standing there staring at that machine, had to be one of complete wonder and admiration.

     That moment started what for me, probably amounts to a typical teen boys fascination with cars. It waxed and waned over the years.  The cooler cars on my list of "must drives" or 'must haves" were perpetually out of my financial reach. This was exacerbated, I am sure by personal problems in my own life, including struggles with substance abuse.  By the time I was in my late 40's I had been struggling with a battle with alcohol for nearly a decade.  I had given up all ideas of things like sporty cars in favor of Canadian Whiskey and imported wine.  But after nearly a decade of fighting, I surrendered.  I went looking for help, and I found it. With a lot of help and support, I got myself clean and sober.

   Almost two years into my sobriety, my best friend: Kevin, noted to me that I probably needed something more productive to do with all my free time now, that didn't involve World of Warcraft.  By this point in my life, I had finally managed to start putting a little money aside . My appreciation for cars had come to encompass imported vehicles as well, specifically the Japanese variety, more specifically roadsters.  Kevin knew, I had been harboring a desire to purchase another Miata almost since the moment I had sold my first one almost a decade earlier.  I had given it up in favor of focusing more energy on my drinking activities.   Kevin suggested to me that "I really should find a way to reward myself for getting my shit straight".  And the hunt for the new project commenced.

Day One

    I found it, several months later.  I had looked at probably 30 or 40 different cars.  Nothing was "right".  I had criteria.  It HAD to be 1990-1993.  No power steering.  No anti lock brakes.  No power windows.  Hell, if it didn't have retractable headlights, it wasn't a "real roadster".  I wanted a go-cart, wrapped in tin foil and I found it in Bradenton.  I pulled up to the house with Melissa in the passenger seat.  As I pulled up outside the house, I looked at her and said "this is it"  She said "you haven't even looked at it yet.   I pointed to the 24 year old owner of the car.  He was standing in the driveway, soaked from the water of the wash, lovingly, carefully wiping the hood down with a cloth diaper.  I said "If that's the way he's taking care of this car, I don't need to see it. I already know everything I need to about it"  I paid his asking price of $3900 for a 30 year old car with 165 thousand miles on it, and drove it back to the house, where the transmission promptly locked up.

     Fast Forward a couple of years.  My fingerprints and my signature are all over this car. It got a name: "General Tojo" (because Dukes of Hazzard) and it got as much love and attention as Melissa would tolerate.  My fingers have touched nearly every surface of this car.  It has been completely disassembled and reassembled numerous times in the driveway. Every light works.  Every latch works.  Every part of the car works pretty much as it did the day it left the factory. In some cases, better than the factory.  There is an engine management system on a laptop that lives behind the passenger seat.  That computer allows for on the fly adjustments of the entire engine even while the car is being driven. Performance parts and a beefy upgrades to the suspension put this little Hair Dressers car at a slick blistering 98 Horsepower that will eat you alive in the bendies.  (And no, if YOU call the General a hair dressers car, I will beat the shit out of you with my purse)

     Hours and Days have been spent researching and integrating just the right modifications, repairs and in some cases upgrades, that will make the car unique, while keeping it as close to stock as I can. I have spent countless hours staring into the lost distance at junkyards across the country looking for an exact bolt or part, and in most cases, I left empty handed.  But sometimes I find gems. Don't ask me about Miatas or The General unless you are prepared to sit down with two cups of coffee and lose a couple of hours of your life you will never get back.  I am not going to get into numbers, but I will say this: If I die tomorrow, please do NOT let Melissa sell The General for what I have "told her" I have invested in it---get it appraised first!  Melissa now has her own Miata, and we belong to a local group of pretty cool Hairdressers who get together once a month and talk about coil overs and forced induction.  Melissa is even learning the lingo.

Melissas 2003 special edition blue mica Miata

     You might ask, why? Why do it? Most of the time, I probably couldn't give you what might equate to a rational response to that question, beyond "It's more productive than drinking, albeit, probably more expensive".  But yesterday, I got my answer.  I am used to answering questions about the car.  It looks good, it sounds good, and its an antique after all.  But yesterday, I was driving home from doing some shopping, top down, wind blowing gracefully through my greying mop of hair.  Mannish Boy by Muddy Waters was slowly oozing out of the Polk Audio waterproof marine speakers nestled in the doors. I slowed down to a 15 mph crawl as I passed through a school zone when I noticed it.  About 50 feet in front of me, walking down the sidewalk, were two boys, about 13 years old, noses buried in their phones slowly walking toward me when one of them heard my muffler bellowing and looked up.  I recognized it at once.  The look that crossed his face.  Eyes bugged out as his jaw dropped slightly.  His gaze never deviated from the general as he started violently nudging his friend.  The friend looked my direction and promptly forgot whatever text he was reading.  they both stopped putting feet in front of each other and just stood there pivoting as I passed by them... eyes wide, jaws open, looking exactly like Howie Grace did on that cold spring morning back in 1983... where a seed was planted.

Editor's note: upon review, several members of my esteemed Miata club, Very graciously pointed out to me that I had neglected to include a picture of Melissa's car, the "fairer" of the cars in my immediate Miata family.  So after some gnashing of teeth and some snapping of curling irons, I have edited this post to include a picture of the chosen vehicle.  Enjoy! 

Redemption

 

     I have, in the last few years, attempted to refrain from being too open about my personal problems.  Not because I'm withdrawn, but mostly because I'm of the mindset that most people don't want to hear about someone else's problems.  However, I need to delve into it for a bit so I can tell y'all this story. So bare with me.   I, am a raging alcoholic.  there, I said it.  For those of you who don't know, or were not paying attention, I spent well over a decade drinking myself to death.  I destroyed relationships.  I lost jobs. I sunk my career.  I went through a lot of self destruction.  I'll spare all bits and pieces and just say that about 3 years ago, I finally hit rock bottom and sought out some help.  Here is a little story that happened to me along the way.  I wanted to share it with you.

    A couple of years before I quit drinking, I had a friend land me a gig working for a company that was, by all means, a really decent job.  The job was driving a truck.  The guy I had to work for, His name was Cliff.  Well, wouldn't you know it? Cliff was just a complete asshole.  Former military.  Way too uptight.  Way too organized.  Abrasive and way too intimidating. Set in his ways, no matter how wrong they were.  But, I really had to put it in there and deal with this guy if I wanted the job.  He was the supervisor after all.  So, I did what I had to do.  All I wanted was to get through the days and spend my free time drinking as much as possible anyway.  This job was great for that, because I spent a lot of time on the road living in hotel rooms where no one could watch me.  I had the whole world fooled.

    The job was seasonal.  I finished out the season, and returned the next year to do it all over again.  In the course of that year and a half, I got more and more frustrated with the job.  Mostly because people were accusing me of "things I didn't do"  Cliff became such a pain to work for.  Breathing down my neck about shit that I didn't do.  Or at the very least, stuff that wasn't my fault.  I finally left the job before finishing out the season.  I ducked out to take another job and left Cliff in a tight spot.  He and I (mostly he) had an exchange of words that was far from pleasant.  Some very mean things were said, and I left.

    I went through a couple of jobs after that.  None of them lasted quite a year, because my drinking kept getting me into trouble.  It was about this time that I had a moment of clarity in my life, and realized that I desperately needed help to get away from booze.  I sought it out, and I found some wonderful people to help me with that.  I had been sober for about 6 months when I realized that I really needed to put some focus on getting my professional life back to something productive.  It was almost time for season to start again at the company where I had started working with Cliff, and I did what any self respecting man in recovery would do, I put my hat in my hands and cleared my throat. 

    My hands were shaking when I dialed Cliff's number.  It rang about 8 times...  I was thinking through how to word my voicemail message when he answered the phone.  I spent a few minutes laying out to this man what I was doing.  I explained my recovery.  I apologized for my behavior.  And then I asked him if he could find it in his heart, I could really use a second chance.  Cliff got quiet, He said "let me consider it and I will get back to you".  I thanked him and hung up.  Two weeks later, I got the message: Cliff was NOT in the business of giving second chances.  In, fact he never did it.  But, against his own better judgement, he was going to give me another chance.  I got the gig.    I worked hard through the season.  Did my job, and did it without complaining, and to the best of my ability.  At the end of the season, Cliff came up to me and shook my hand.  He told me that he was proud of me.  He said that I had really made an impression on him.  And then he told me that he wasn't going to answer the phone the day I called, but something compelled him to, and he didn't regret it. 

    I continued to do some occasional work for Cliffs company.  Cliff moved on to another job.  I ended up running with the employment and turning it into a pretty good, reliable income for myself.  I branched out to a few other companies, and today, I work for several different organizations within the entertainment business as a freelance driver. I got to go on tour with Phil Collins and Billy Joel before the corona virus hit.   I kept in touch with Cliff.  Keeping him updated on my life and my recovery, and the progress I was making in both areas.  

This week, I saw that the company Cliff was working for had a very large gig in my home town.  On a whim, I texted Cliff and asked if he would be coming.  Indeed, he would, but he wouldn't have time for much more than a lunch break. I insisted on meeting this man for lunch.  We made the arrangements.  I take the practice of breaking bread with another person very seriously.  I really don't like eating with people that I don't trust or don't like.  Life is too short.  So, with just about an hour to spare, I sat down with this man. I insisted on paying for his lunch, because I believe that I might not have the opportunities that I have in front of me today, had this man not given me a second chance. We ate, and we talked, like friends.  I had a really good time.  Free of stress, and just soaking in the conversation and the company of a man that I had really grown to appreciate.  We parted ways with a hand shake, and promised to keep in touch, which I am positive we will.   

If you ever come to believe that you are beyond redemption, don't be afraid to stop and take stock of your surroundings.  Humble pie can taste better than you might think.  It's also healthy for the digestive system.  And if you have ever just about had enough of someone screwing up and doing all the wrong things, If they show they have the desire to change, and are taking the steps, at least consider giving them another chance.  They MAY let you down again, but if just ONE person can prove you wrong, and redeem themselves.... Well then, I bet that's a pretty amazing feeling!

Thank You Cliff.  I cant say that hard enough!

(In case you are wondering, going on 3 years sober now, but that's not what this story is about)